Big Hair Romp (1974)

The plot of Big Hair Romp is so well-hidden that a gratuitous voice-over was inserted near the beginning just to provide the illusion of a plot for those of us boorish enough to need one in a porno film: two ex-cons, Stick and Spade, pick up (or get picked up by) three pretty girls, and the voice-over tells us that the two guys just did ten years in the slammer for fraud – no doubt they’re the producers of this flick – and that the girls are “budding actresses from good families.”Our “budding actresses” here have a serious oral fixation, and they are quick to home in on Stick’s husky “thingamabob,” as they reverently call it. So there s lively intercourse between “cun & con,” and when a knee gets in the way, the vexed director can be heard off-camera saying, “Hey, we’re not seeing any of this!”Then, out of nowhere, Chuck, The Gay Photographer, is called in to shoot some stills of the ex-cons. Played by sexploitation stalwart John Keith (whose performance has more ham in it than a New York deli), Chuck, The Gay Photographer, actually provides a certain welcome comic relief to the usual porn strenuousities, especially when the budding actresses fixate orally on him.